Let’s talk about PTSD and triggers – and a
way to communicate ahead of a full-blown anxiety situation. As you become more familiar with what causes
situations to move toward a negative situation, or a rising sense of
foreboding, you’ll likely learn what triggers set off you or your family
member. Yes, it’s important to include
you in this equation, since many caregivers also have accumulated symptoms of
secondary PTS, and the resultant hypervigilance, mood changes, effects of
insomnia, and stress.
Working together as a team, a family can learn
to mitigate certain situations, such as crowds, loud and volatile situations,
including family holiday dinners. Creating
a non-verbal signal puts you and your family member in charge of alerting one
another. Keep it simple, a tap on your wrist,
a hand signal or perfect the Let’s-Get-Out-of-Here-Soon glance. Demonstrating that you understand your family
member (or you) are feeling rising anxiety, stress, or discomfort with the
situation is helpful and allows you to more gracefully depart most situations
promptly. What a relief to avoid gutting out every difficult occasion!
Recently, I heard a wonderful follow-up to
this trigger signal by a smart and thoughtful caregiver named Lauren. After these signals are given, departure is complete,
when the next quiet moment comes, she and her husband engage in a short
discussion. Either one asks: First, are
YOU okay? Second, is the Situation okay
now? And, Third and most important, Are WE okay? This is a strong team effort that is kind and
intuitive.
Take time this week to create your own PTS
Alert Signal, practice it until the all feel united and comfortable, then
consider asking those three key questions to keep the calm channels of
communication open and willing.
Linda Kreter & the
VeteranCaregiver Team
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