Winter Blahs!

Over the past few weeks I have spoken to a number of families who seem to be struggling in many ways, just to deal with day-to-day life.  One family had multiple health problems with many medical appointments, another had a death which required an out of state trip. Even in my own family we have had various depressing problems.

I went to have coffee with a good friend and I was talking to her about life in general getting harder to deal with.  She looked at me with great seriousness and told me I had caught the Winter Blahs. I laughed thinking she was joking. Well, in part she was but she was also deadly serious.  This time of year is often hardest for families who are caregiving. Getting someone in a wheelchair to hospital appointments can be a nightmare in bad weather. Snow, icy roads and freezing fog combine to make any driving stressful.  Multiple illness in a household causes more stress.  Children can be cooped up in the house with few ways to get rid of excess energy.

I have been trying to think of ways, just small ways, to help get through this part of the year.  For one thing the days of clouds and low light really depresses me so I have switched to full spectrum lights in many parts of my house, especially the lights I use mostly.

I try to find one thing each day to look forward to for myself.  It can be 15 minutes with a good book, a quick manicure or planning my garden for when the spring comes.

 If I have things to do that I really do not want to deal with, I try and do those early in the day if I can. That way they are not nagging at me for hours.

I  get outside in the fresh air even if it is just for a few moments.  I look for joy in small things; an insect creeping up a leaf or a pattern in the clouds (which was always a game when I was a kid). I also remind myself that winter is not going to last and that the sniffles and fog and horrid road trips will be gone soon.

 I get exercise of some sort even if it is with the Wii or the stair stepper. I'll see if I can fit in a new project; being creative is a good cure for the Blahs. Knitting, painting, cooking or sewing are all productive and you can see the results of your work. Right now I am trying to grow some fresh herbs in pots on the window ledge.

Above all the support of friends and family helps. Being stuck together in a small space can make all of us edgy, but  if you can get the family involved with a little planning you can chase away these Winter Blahs.

Ahh, PTSD Awareness & Compassion Shown!

Greetings, friends,

One of my favorite Caregivers called today with a story of a great out-in-public experience.  Her husband, a veteran with moderate to severe PTSD wanted to go to the midnight showing of the new movie, The Avengers last night.  She was surprised, and also glad.  How very normal!  She immediately began mentally considering the environment:  they knew the building, the exits, the parking, the ticket line, but surely the crowds on opening night would be daunting?  Quick discussion: he really wanted to make the effort, so on they went.

The theatre and surrounding area was packed with people and after she’d bought the tickets, her vet started to become fairly agitated.  Since she’d been planning in her mind for the past hour, she easily located the manager and explained that her husband was a combat veteran with PTSD, and would he possibly help them?  The manager asked what specifically disturbed him?  She replied:  the crowd, needing a seat near the exit, some sounds, and the hope of not disturbing others.  His face cleared, and he said:  “Oh, like Captain America!”  (Captain America was the star character of a World War II movie of a veteran who was frozen in time, but when he “came back” years later, he had these same PTSD reactions and went on to become a super-hero.) 

The manager immediately asked a few smart questions, then guided them to the smallest of the many theatres, found them seats apart from others yet with clear access to the exit, and also said that if they needed to leave, he would comp their tickets.  He even went on to say that if there were a group of vets in the area who wanted to view the movie together that they would be glad to arrange it at a quieter time!

The loved the movie.  They were grateful to the manager.  And, mostly, they loved the outlook that (unlike the recent media sensationalism of PTSD), this veteran was compared to Captain America – a character that had been changed by his military service – but who was regarded as a Hero.  

Bottom line:  with calm planning, informing others of their needs, and a blessing in the form of a wonderful theatre manager, a wonderful movie night was enjoyed by all!

May you all enjoy a Captain America experience very soon,

Linda 

An Alternate Universe - or am I just dealing with the VA again?

"I have spoken to four doctors and they say you are not in pain"

"A temperature of 103.5? Well, ride it out at home! "
" What if it goes to 105?"
"Ride it out at home"
"What about 107?"
"You would be dead"

"I am the only PIK line person for 7 floors and the outpatients. I have already worked 11 hours with no overtime pay. I still have patients to see…"

"You need to move nearer the VAMC"

"Sorry we can't get a line in. Come back next Tuesday.."

"Yes, this is the crisis line. I am going to give you another number to call"

You will need to drive 180 miles, six days per week for your pain medication.

"The ambulance is just an expensive cab ride. Put her in the car…"

"We cannot give you Morphine, you might become addicted" (This patient was 87!)

"Blood pressure 68/48 Oh that’s a great BP. You must be an athlete. Oh you are feeling dizzy…?"

No I am not making these things up! These are actual statements by medical 'professionals'. Over the past years I have made a collection of these. To any sane or normal person, they are garbage. I wonder how long the VA can go on allowing their staff to spew out this junk. This makes absolutely no sense, and trying to find any logic in this is totally futile.
Is this part of a plan to make us all so crazy that we go away? Is this some covert operation to rid themselves of those Veterans who need help? Do they deliberately make it as difficult as possible for us to hang on to our sanity by a small thread? Or are they all in an alternate universe and trying to drag us there too?
To be truthful I don't think this is part of an underhanded plan. Why? Because I don't think they have enough organizational skills to make such a plan. To care for the vast number of wounded heroes that these recent wars have produced takes careful planning. It needs common sense, good judgment and many different approaches. To be able to integrate all these things into one unified whole takes organization. That they do not have. The whole VA system is like a huge bloated slug. Can barely move under its own weight and leave a trail of slime wherever it touches.
In the past I have tried very hard, as most of us have, to work within the system. Now it is becoming more and more obvious that working in their system is impossible. With statements like these above, they are in another universe. One where I am not prepared to go.